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I was scrolling through old photos of the boys the other day. We’re coming up on our three-year anniversary as a family—a day we celebrate as “Family Day.” (Adoption day is in August.) It’s one more reason to be thankful in November.

Looking at those pictures, I couldn’t help but stare at their little-boy faces. Rounded cheeks and smiles for days. Those cheeks have thinned out now, and the smiles are sometimes replaced with eyerolls and glares—8 and 10 going on 17.

As adoptive parents, there’s a lot we “missed out” on. We didn’t get to witness all the boys’ firsts. We didn’t see their first steps or hear their first words. We don’t have baby pictures or tiny locks of hair tucked away in keepsake boxes.

But what we do have is just as special—progression. It might not be from birth, and it might be more subtle, but we get to see it and experience it every single day.

As I scrolled, I saw the photo of Boy2’s gap-toothed grin from when he lost his first tooth. I remembered how he played with that wiggly tooth nonstop, then panicked a little when it finally fell out and there was blood. The Tooth Fairy’s first visit more than made up for it. I saw Boy1 hugging Mickey Mouse on his first trip to Disney World—and then hugging Olaf on his fourth. Their first hockey game, first Cub Scout awards, first soccer practice, first soccer game, first bite of calamari, first sushi roll, first time meeting Santa Claus, first trip to Washington, D.C.—the list goes on.

While we didn’t get to experience their traditional firsts, we still get plenty of our own. We get to be there to support them during so many of life’s important moments. I look forward to the future firsts, too—first love, first job, first day of college, first time driving. (Well, maybe not that one.)

It’s all about perspective, truly. I could dwell on the moments I missed—the things that happened in another home and not ours. Or I can embrace all the beautiful, magical moments I get to share with my boys. I’d much rather do that.

Hubs and I don’t take our little family for granted. We dreamed, prayed, and waited for years for what we have now—a family, a home, peace. We live one day at a time and soak in every special moment. We’re building memories we hope will last a lifetime.

💛 What’s a “first” in your family that might not be traditional—but is just as meaningful?