momma mommy bwuh

In the words of Ferris Bueller:

“Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”

That’s honestly the best way to describe the last several months. Lots of activity. Lots of moments. And I’ve just been trying to soak it all in. To be present with my kids and my husband.

We’re not promised anything, you know?

Hubs and I missed out on a good bit of our boys’ lives. It’s something that’s difficult to think about sometimes, but ultimately, we are at peace with the fact that we have some of their past—and all of their present and future.

Maybe that’s why I have such a strong desire to be present now. To not miss any more of their moments, if I can help it.

So, my life has been hectic, to say the least. Trying to be present as a mom while also working full time, homeschooling, keeping up with the house, and attempting some semblance of self-care just wasn’t realistic.

I read something on social media recently that said something along the lines of women holding themselves to ridiculous standards. We think we have to be Mom of the Year, Employee of the Month, and somehow excel at every other role we’ve taken on, too. We set these unrealistic expectations for ourselves, shoulder all the burdens, and then wonder why we eventually snap.

Can we normalize not doing it all?

Can we just agree to do the best we can—even if some nights that looks like peanut butter and jelly for dinner and other nights it’s a themed cookout?

Can we be okay with cluttered countertops and a new package of paper towels sitting out for a few days before someone finally puts them away?

Does everything HAVE to be Pinterest-worthy all the time?

Sigh.

I was trying to juggle it all.

Actually, I’ve been trying to juggle it all.

And it’s tough.

I think when we have too many balls in the air, we start to lose little pieces of ourselves. At least I did.

I became so focused on giving everyone else the perfect experience that I got tired. I got sick. I stayed in this constant state of blah. I was being Super-Mom at the expense of myself.

And amid all of that, was I actually being present?

Not really.

And that was the damn goal in the first place.

To be present.

To participate.

To actually experience these moments I was working so hard to create.

But I couldn’t fully do that because I was too busy keeping all those balls in the air. My mind was always on the next thing that needed to happen. The next task. The next responsibility. The next thing I needed to make perfect.

Not the moment happening right in front of me.

So, I’ve made some decisions. Some changes. I’m trying to get back the pieces of myself that kept me grounded and happy before I decided I needed to be everything to everyone.

And let’s be real—I’m still gonna try to be everything to everyone. That’s just how I’m wired.

But I’m working hard on prioritizing what is truly important to me. What makes me happy. What keeps me grounded. What fills my cup.

Because maybe I can pour from an empty cup.

But why should I have to?

What’s one “ball” you’ve decided—or need—to put down so you can be more present for the life happening right in front of you?